Happy 52nd Birthday Malaysia - You Have Got a LONG Way to Go!

Original source of this article can be found here.

Malays Speaking Without Fear.

By Nurul Izzah Anwar

AUG 31 — I can’t say that I know Datuk Zaid Ibrahim very well. Our past encounters have been limited to a fleeting hello in front of the steps of my alma mater, the Johns Hopkins University’s School of Advanced International Studies in 2006, another chat during a reception in honour of Datuk Ambiga Sreevanesagan in June and, most recently, at the PKR’s recent EGM. It’s amazing, but perhaps unsurprising that he has in these three years evolved from an ambiguous reformist in Umno into the conscience of all Malaysians.

I had always been impressed by his outspokenness, and his willingness to fearlessly voice out his views on issues of national importance is nothing short of inspirational. Zaid does not mince his words where many hesitate to call a spade a spade, especially where it matters the most.

An articulate Malay speaking out for a multiracial and progressive Malaysia is terribly important in this current political climate. For our own community, Zaid epitomises how the Malays might redefine ourselves, to re-imagine a world where we do not think that we are inferior or threatened but are rather confident in whom we are.

In reading Zaid’s book Saya Pun Melayu, I sense the need for Malays to embrace a new paradigm on what it means to be Malay. Many indeed are doing so and this is a heartening. “Malay” need no longer carry connotations of dependency on the state, insecurity or the crippling feeling alienation and the lack of self-worth.

The word “Malay” can and must eventually mean a call to embrace a broader Malaysian identity, along with a true, inclusive nationalism that is proud of who we are individually but also in what we have accomplished together. We can be sure of our identities and yet still be a part of something greater than all of us — and this is something all the ethnic groups in Malaysia ought to aspire to.

Zaid’s book highlights that fact that we need to look beyond the stereotypes and take an objective, albeit positive look at our community’s accomplishments. We have made great strides in business, the arts, education and the professions. Our success extends from Lembah Pantai where Malays own vibrant businesses selling products made by Malays to the flourishing nasi lemak stalls in Kota Baru.

We attend leading universities throughout the world, increasingly through our own merit. We can count internationally recognised choreographers, painters, cartoonists, writers, and film directors amongst our numbers.

Beyond these markers, our success can more often that not be seen at home through our everyday acts of compassion and sensitivity to others, which spread to our fellow Malaysians to become a national virtue. The kindness shown towards our children, parents and neighbours is perhaps one of the most important signs of who we Malays are as a community. These are real achievements that no one can or would want to take from us.

I’m not denying that we still have a long way to go in moving our community forward, nor am I unmindful that a lot of our successes would not have been in possible without the NEP and its institutions. However, it has become patently obvious that these structures are now holding the Malays back, and that the world has changed since then.

The Malays and, as a-matter-of-fact, all Malaysians need to change as well if we want to remain relevant in this world. We need to step away from our obsession with all things racial and realise that the project of nation-building is not a zero-sum game. Malaysia can never succeed until and unless its entire people feel like they are truly a part of it.

Why then does the old paradigm of ethnic insecurity persist? Why does suspicion and acrimony towards our fellow Malaysians and they towards us still linger? Why are mainstream newspapers calling for ethnic conflict, accusing minority communities of all sorts of ludicrous plots?

The sad reality is that these myths are being perpetuated by Umno and Barisan Nasional for their own gain. The fact is that Umno wants to keep the Malay community under its suzerainty forever. They do this by focusing on what we have supposedly not achieved, rather than acknowledging our gains and potential.

They claim to want to protect and uplift the Malay community, but all they have been doing for the last few years is playing on their fears and prejudices. The same can be said for the Barisan components with the non-Malays. This glass-half-empty mentality is being used by Umno/BN to protect each other and to ward off challenges to their stranglehold on power.

We’ve seen from the case of Zaid of how Umno demonises anyone who steps out of the pattern of complete loyalty to the party and who have different ideas on how to improve the livelihoods of Malays and Malaysians. We have also as of late seen their scare tactics in action. They have labelled people as “traitors” for calling for a new path of development for Malaysia. They prefer to protect their interests rather than allow the Malaysian people — especially the Malays — to benefit from reform, less corruption and more inclusion.

Umno also regrettably perpetuates the myth that the Malay community is perpetually under threat from their non-Malay counterparts, and that Umno is the only party that can save them from this supposed “servitude”. This, rather than anything else, is why race relations have gotten worse in Malaysia.

You cannot expect harmony in a country where its largest ethnic group is constantly bombarded with the message that the minorities are supposedly out to get them and take away their rights. Yet, they chose to follow this tactic since they believe in the short term this will strengthen Umno and bring Malays back to the party.

They use these “attacking” tactics because they cannot offer anything else. They have shown that they would prefer to entrench those in power rather than allow new ideas and reforms to increase our chances for greater success. There is a real danger that their short-sightedness may cost future generations of Malaysians dearly.

The fact is that Malays have nothing to fear. We are demographically the largest ethnic group in Malaysia and the birth rate is going to keep it that way. Our position in the constitution is enshrined and this isn’t going to change either.

That is what Umno and the Malay extremists do not get, and what the community as a whole needs to understand. The non-Malays and Malays who challenge Umno are not seeking to reduce the position of the Malays in anyway, but to defend and uplift all Malaysians. We have to understand that we are all tied together and that we all have a stake in the land. We cannot survive individually as Malays, Chinese or Indians but as Malaysians.

Our non-Malay fellow citizens are not “challenging” our rights or “insulting” or culture and religion — rather they are calling for our nascent nationhood to be allowed to achieve it’s full potential than for us to remain stuck in our ethnic and mental ghettos. The liberals and moderates amongst the non-Malays also suffer from the depredations of extremists within their own communities — they deserve our support as well. The wave of reactionary politics that is engulfing us can only be turned back if progressive Malaysians stand firm against their threats and untruths.

While it is true that much more needs to be done to address those who have not benefited — for all Malaysians — the focus on what we don’t have rather on what we have accomplished only undermines us. We need to imagine a better future, for Malays and Malaysians — this will incidentally make it easier for all of us to achieve what we might lack.

The Malaysia of tomorrow cannot be one in which we are blinded by fear and negativity. The first step in imagining and defining a better future for all of us is to open our eyes and speak out like Zaid and others like him.

Imbalance.

I think Max may be interested in having another cat around the house. I’ve been playing some cat sounds, and no matter where he is in the apartment, he’ll coming running into my room. A second cat is something I only started to consider recently. Last year it felt as if I wouldn’t be able to handle the chores, let alone doubling the annual veterinarian bill. Sometimes he seems lonely though, like when he immediately starts to cry when I walk in the door after a day of work, his protesting only being soothed after picking him up, and being replaced by a low purr. I’ve always seen myself as a one cat person; I think I’d feel a little imbalanced if I had more than one. If I do decide to get one, it will definitely be after I start making more money, and possibly after I can purchase a bigger apartment. It would be more for Max than for me though. I can’t imagine finding another cat that is as well-adapted as he is, so the idea scares me a little.

One time I discussed with G whether he would ever consider getting two dogs. He said that he couldn’t, not just because it would be much harder to handle, but because he would feel more favourable to one or the other.

The idea of favour is one that I haven’t been able to understand. How can parents love all their kids without liking one more than the other, especially when one follows the desires of the parents more closely. It might be something I don’t understand, growing up as an only child. If such a balance is possible, wouldn’t polygamous relationships work as well? I think part of the misunderstanding stems from my confusion of relational love and parental love as well.

For love is the root of my imbalance.

Pandora's Curse.

I had a dream last night, a dream that seemed so real, a dream I did not want. A dream of scattered memories sewn together, creating such a perfect world, where love was requited, where I was blissfully happy. When I awoke, everything I had was gone.

All I was left with was hope, and emptiness. I immediately knew that what I had was false, too perfect a world for me to live in. I felt bitter, as if I had something taken away from me which I felt was rightfully mine.

Why would my subconscious trick me so? Why should I feel so terrible, so laden with hope? Couldn’t my mind simply give up this struggle, freely, without interference?

Hope is not a good thing for me. It makes me weak and vulnerable. When I have no hope, then all is known. Nothing is uncertain. I am sure of what I have and what I don’t have. Progress can be made on accepting this. But when hope enters my mind, all progress is lost, and I can only try to fight for what I’ve gained.

Yet I wish to dream again tonight, of memories strewn together, for they were so wonderful, that any let down seems worth it. I don’t know why I’d want to torture myself again, feeling empty and bitter when I wake up. Somehow, the high seems worth it, like some addictive drug Pandora was selling out of her magical box of plagues and death.

Perhaps I actually do believe in what my hope is telling me. Perhaps I need to believe in something, that somehow this will change, that things will be different. Or perhaps I’m simply a fool, willingly falling for something that may make me happy, but empty in the end.

Nothing good ever came out of Pandora’s box.

M is for .. Making it worthwhile.

Sometimes it feels like there’s too much to think about, too much to wonder about, too much to understand. It seems like I’ll never be able to catch up with all my thoughts. There are too many things that take me too long to know. Yet I’m still learning, or trying, at least, every day.

I wish I had all the time in the world to figure things out, to become wiser or more intelligent.

It would be worth it.

Leader or Follower?

It's an old question of the day which made me think of my own responses. But before that, I'll put down the definitions for a leader and follower, for my sake and yours so that we understand where we're coming from.

Leader – A person who rules or guides or inspires others.
Follower – A person who accepts the leadership of another.

The common stereotype of a leader is someone who's in charge. Normally someone higher up the hierarchy. Your parents, your boss, some older senior who's picking on you all the time, someone who makes the final decision and tells you what to do. They dictate your role and you're expected to follow making you the stereotypical follower.

The pattern of being a traditional leader or a follower is built over the respect of a social status, the knowledge and ignorance between the leader and the followers and fear of repercussions by the one in charge. At the end of it, this is what most people know and understand because at it's most basic levels, this is all too often true.

But being a leader or a follower doesn't always equate to a how you appear in public. While I still define a leader as someone who makes the final decision, it doesn't necessarily mean that the most public figure displays true leadership. A poster boy can command an audience yes, but if what they say and do aren't actions of their own, then by all means, they aren't leaders.

All too often the illusion of who is in charge is overlooked by the masses who only understand that what you see is what you get. If leadership is based on the one who makes the final decision, then those who work behind the curtains to place, to inspire and to guide the public figures around are the real leaders. To that end, a person can be your boss, but they can never be your superior.

The same can be said for dominant/submissive relationships. To those unfamiliar with the world, it is the submissives who have power over the dominant partner because at the end of it, it is the submissive who ultimately dictate how far they can go. This kind of inverse powerplay is more suited in the world today where the lines are blurred between our roles in society and our understanding of our individual persona.

Now, I can answer the original question because I know I am not a follower. I do whatever I can to dictate the eventual outcome of the life ahead of me. Irrespective of who I bow my head down to, every one I know has their place along my life and every action I take is with a purpose. I know, I will never have the ability to become an actor on the stage, but I do know I have what it takes to be the director and producer behind the scenes. If there is a goal to something, I will produce a storyline towards that end.

So am I a leader? Not if you want to count me as a public figure. But as someone that can orchestrate and execute plans within plans. I know now that I fit that bill. Chances are, I won't be remembered down in history as someone who did something great, but in great people are the small deeds that they do with great passion and commitment. Maybe that's how a leader should be, at least one I aspire to become.

L is for .....Lousy Days Are Here.

I'm sorry."

"That's alright, it happens all the time."

Yes it happens all the time and while I shouldn't be feeling any more down and out than I already am, it's hard not to. There are a lot of things on my shoulder right now and while that usually isn't cause for concern, the lack of finding something to take my mind off things is once again taking its toll on me.

The only optimistic thing here is that I'm so engrossed in my work for most of the day that I hardly find the time to worry about the things that go wrong, instead do whatever I can to compensate for the lack of needful things. It's just that when the sun goes down, I find myself taking my work home with me in an effort to stave off the inevitable sense of isolation and helplessness that's wrapped about me like a cloak. So much so that I have foregone sleep in the attempt not to spend those few moments lying there in bed wishing for someone to walk me through the night.

Is a friend to talk to too much to ask in times of need?

In My Darkest Moments...

It's hard to live each day when you don't know when they will come for you.

It's hard to appreciate each moment when you have to keep watching your own back.

Like a prisoner on death row, the end could come at any time.

I don't want this dream to end, but the inevitable has to come to pass as all dreams have to come to an end.

It's just a matter of whether or not the nightmare will take its place.

The clock is ticking, it always does.

So I Caved In....

People have asked me if I was on Twitter. "No," I would say, "I barely have time to blog let alone twit, or tweet, or twat, or whatever those people are calling it these days."

But ... as you can probably guess, I've finally caved. I only have 12 followers so far, so yes, it's a fairly exclusive club.

I have no idea how it even works or how long I'll be using it before I decide I've had enough, but if you feel like it, join up or sign up or follow me around or whatever you call it. I am asking you this mostly because I don't know if I can keep thinking shit up for 12 people, no matter how awesome and ahead of the curve they are.

Tell your friends. Originally I was thinking your real, live friends and not your Facebook friends, but OK, you can tell your Facebook friends, too.

I should hang a banner up there that says, "Don't Expect Too Much."

I'll try to deliver at least that. Thanks!

Idle Thoughts.

Some days you are your own best friend.
Other days you can be your worst enemy.
Then there are the days in between.

87 Drafts.

I've got 87 posts that I've begun to write, but for some reason or another, never got around to finishing it. I gave them a quick scan and came to the conclusion that they are not worth finishing.

It's funny how something I thought worthy of meaning even a few short months ago, is now deemed to be nothing at all in the present moment. Funny how my mind works.

All about context, I suppose. As every day passes, my thoughts change ... what I find important or unimportant changes ... priorities change. Time changes everything even without meaning to. Even over a short period of time.

Life is funny. Hilarious at times ... perplexing for most of it. Completely unpredictable to some extent. I mean not really, but we lead ourselves to believe that it can be. Life isn't unpredictable. It's not completely set in stone, but our every past action has led us to where we are today. So in that sense, we kind of felt the direction we were taking and knew to some extent where we were headed.

Again a post with no meaning, but this won't go in the drafts. Not all of my thoughts or posts need to be planned out. They don't all have to tell a story. They can be haphazard. Right? Well, it's my blog so the answer to the question would be one that agrees.

Am I making sense? It's okay. Not everything has to make sense all the time.

Judging Senorita.

There are people on this planet who get an idea and work hard to realise it. Others sit on the fence and ponder. Some weigh up options then make informed decisions. Others talk themselves out of a venture due to the fear of losing a comfort zone.

Out of these shooting stars, some get to accomplish their dreams, others who don’t get to revel in success remain undefeated and possibly try again.

When an astute person takes an adventurous step into the unknown, inevitably they ruffle others’ feathers. Other people’s reactions to their ventures are varied, yet they invariably express them in context of either biasness and diffidence.

There are the naysayers, the I-thought-of-it-before (yet didn’t do it), the la-la-la singers with palms firmly over perky ears, the wise monkey emulators with eyes shut but curiously peeking through gaps in their fingers; it's a pity some do not know how to speak no evil. All act according to personal gain and hidden agendas, eventually passing a judgement that feeds their purpose.

What shines across the galaxy like the Evening Star after sunset are the heartfelt and the genuine, the stellar individuals who may or may not covet others yet wholeheartedly (and without prejudice) support them in their endeavours.

They are as easy to spot with the naked eye as a full moon in a starless sky.